Permission

 

Dear younger me,

I wish I had given you generosity and permission. 
Permission to be gangly and skinny, because that's what was natural for you.
And then again as you filled out, hips and curves.
Allowing yourself to enjoy the capabilities of your body instead of constant criticism-

of measuring my body to others- both real and imagined.

You didn't know the challenges of chronic illness yet, or how hard it would be to

undo the way you see yourself as time goes on.

Younger me was a teenager in a small town. 

Younger me was a college student studying and exploring.

Younger me was yesterday. 

Younger me was this afternoon in the REI fitting room.

Present me is giving permission.

Permission to enjoy all that my body is capable of doing.

Celebration, too, that despite it's flaws and the difficulties it presents, I'm still able to explore this beautiful place I call home:

Mountains and rivers, tree's with ancient wisdom.

Summer bike rides to taprooms with slushies.

Dance parties downtown with your gals because, Taylor Swift.

Yoga and boxing gym sessions.

Snowshoeing and sharing hot chocolate at the summit. 

And, allowance to go home early, because rest is essential. 

Here is permission, younger me.

Love,

Me 

💗